You must feel all the feelings. Really feel them and let them come through to come to a place of acceptance.
Acceptance doesn't come easy. There might be a mental temper tantrum that happens, a kicking and screaming in your brain.
As a parent, we share our children’s' joys and sorrows, pain and happiness. It's no joke. It might bring flash backs of your past. Painful memories that we thought were behind us might be re-lived again and again.
Better to experience those feelings even if they bring sorrow and tears. But when all that emotion is processed, Acceptance may come to you.
From a place of acceptance and presence, we can think through options and sit with information.
Acceptance is elusive, it can sneak away. When it does, feelings can begin to churn again. This is now. This is what is happening now. This is how I am feeling now. This reminds me of when....what?
Bringing yourself back to right now, to present moment, allows us to lasso acceptance and reel it back to a place where we can grasp and hold onto it.
Talking to people who have your back, sitting still in meditation, being in silence, might be some of the threads of the lasso that make it strong enough to capture the elusive acceptance.
We need a tool or tools to keep bringing acceptance back again and again. It can be too fast and agile without the tools. You can never move forward without that first step.
Remember when you are the most tired, exhausted, beat up, you still have tools to get you through those times. YOU need to find the energy to use the tools you have at your disposal.
When acceptance is captured, there is a calm that might settle over you...the underlying emotions still might be present as well...but the calm is there all the same.
That calm is the place to make your decisions from. Never a moment before.
I hope that you have some tools that help you find and hold onto acceptance when you need it most.
Your tool box might include some kind of exercising, running, painting, journaling, screaming in the car, breathing, yoga practices, meditation, watching a sad or happy movie, reading, punching a pillow or punching bag, hiking, playing with your dog, talking with friends or a therapist.
What do you do to process emotions to find acceptance when you are in a difficult situation? Share so we can all learn from each other.